The "Rakhi Sister"

Once again, Sagnik's post has inspired me to write about my nemesis in each and every failed relationship* I have had, my Judas Escariot, the snake-in-the-grass, the "other" woman, the wolf in sheep's clothing. Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce you to the "Rakhi Sister" (RS).

The "Rakhi Sister" is a female that is not really the sister of the bloke but is almost like his sister. Hence, she is a paragon of virtue, she is charming, beautiful, a true lady and her only purpose in life seems to be aborting every relationship the bloke might want to have on pretext of, "Oh but Rahul**, she isn't good enough for you!!"

When a bloke has a RS, rest assured the bloke will either die a bachelor or marry the RS or her younger sister. The RS will be given the best since the "relationship" the bloke and RS share is so precious, so meaningful and so "connected"! The RS and the bloke celebrate birthdays, anniversaries (the day we realised we were actually brother and sister), rakshabandhan, bhai dooj (never mind that 80% of the time RS and bloke end up marrying each other) and every other festival in true bollywood sister-brother style consisting of soppy CDs, stuffed annimals and if the bloke is loaded, "decent" jewellery.

The RS and bloke will often be seen in one remote, private corner of the earth enjoying the sunset and discussing every little tidbit the two can share. If bloke suddenly sprouts interest in some other babe, a long, meaningful discussion often ensues in which RS will piously observe, "Rahul**, doesn't your GF have a slight squint when she stares in the sun. Toone kabhi poocha nahi ye kaise hua?" or "Rahul**, teri GF to poore samay bas mugti rehti hai, she's such a muggu, nahi?"

Sagnik claims to have never met female versions of what he calls Protectors or Shields, but ladies, you know a Rakhi Sister when you see one. Be afraid ladies, be very afraid of the Rakhi Sister.

* Relationship in which I was remotely interested in the bloke and not the other way round
** Or Sagnik, or Amit or Vicky