Minority Report

I am used to being the minority. In kindergarten, I was the only kid who could read and wanted to read. In school, I was the only one who wasn't into horrid 80s haircuts and popular culture, you see I was the classics-reading blue-stocking-in-the-making kinds and my classmates were not.

In high-school, I was the only one who thought admitting to crushes was lame and would tell my classmates heartlessly, "Why would Aamir Khan look at you? Now, just think, he has Juhi chawla." The boys hated me because I was never embarrassed and was uber-competitive and could ride bikes, motorbikes, scooters and later my dad's car. The key was in never revealing my crush on Rod Stewart. I knew he was old. I knew he was loud and silly, but I'm sure he's a fun guy. Anyhow, I digress. As a result, I was routinely hated.

In college, I was not into flings, college romances and the grapevine. I was into getting good grades and getting the hell out of there, and I'm not bright, so I have always needed to work that much more harder. So, I was hated for not giving into politics and not taking sides.

During my postgrad, I was hated because I was this fat, feminist, non-conformist bitch who thought men were redundant and beat the shit out of the guys at most word, quizzing events. Again, the key was in not revealing my mad crush on the greek god on campus. He was younger, madly good-looking, even in most of the clubs I was in and totally uptight. Still, I forgive him for that. If only he knew just how much I drooled at him on the squash courts.

When I started working, I was over-qualified, hence hated by most of my immediate bosses for being better educated than them. One of them actually gloated at the fact. Bastard! I was also disliked for not conforming to any social convention. Single but happy. Yes, I can pretend wonderfully, and I normally take out all grief out of my system by whining about it on blogs. Anyhow.

Then, I changed jobs and was hated for being younger than most of my team but technically being their boss. I was hated for being again better educated than most. I was hated for not having major tragedies in my life and for apparently sailing through life, If only they knew! So mostly my social scene sucked.

Now, I am an apartment owner. I have to now attend apartment meetings. So far so good. All the rest of the apartment owners are my parents' age. I am in a minority again. I have to pretend I am so concerned about a lot of issues that bore the shit out of me and I think they all know it. I've actually told them I'm 5 years older than I am, and most have kids my incremental age. So, to the homeowners, I'm a kid and to their kids I am a homeowner and hence uncool.

I have realised now, that I shall always be in a minority, mostly because I don't care to conform and do just what I feel like without bothering to think about the consequences. Sometimes it gets awfully lonely, and then I stop and think about how I've never done the majority thing and how uncomfortable I would feel on that side. Still, it would be nice if greek gods noticed me and would sometimes belong on my side.