Bad-tempered Reflections of a Foul-Mouthed, Rude Hussy

Is there anything more irritating than a small-town Indian who has emigrated to the USA? He has realised his wet dream, which only proceeds to bore the living daylights out of yours truly. Can there be anything more boring than middle class american suburbia with its uniform picket fences and backyards? One thing I grant to India, it is never boring. Dirty, dusty, crowded, nosy, annoying, yes - but not boring. What can I say? I'm from a small town originally myself, but at heart, I'm a big town girl.
Also, why does each and every of my friend in California think that doing the napa valley thing is the height of sophistication and they aren't even wine drinkers! Sideways! Die you. And just why would I do the napa valley thing with a bunch of people who (a) do not drink wine (b) proceed to put me off with their bubba acts (c) take zillions of pics and proceed to bore each and every family member and friend for years to come - "look! here is hubby posing with the wine crusher!"
I know, I know, I'm bad-tempered and horrible, but its not my fault, its the fault of the people who've become boring.