100 Grumpy Things

I am mostly grumpy. I am mostly anal. In a wedding of the two, I shall post 100 things about my anal grumpy self.

1. I am almost always grumpy.
2. I am almost always anal.
3. I say "fuck" in my brain every 30 seconds.
4. I don't like most people.
5. I think following trends clotheswise is stupid.
6. I don't like to be criticised.
7. I don't like most men.
8. I don't like feminine men.
9. I don't like men who obssess about their bodies too much.
10. I don't like men who know more about make-up than I do.
11. That said, my favourite hair dresser is a man and he gives the best hair-cut in town and makes me look like a million bucks but he annoys me by calling me "sweetie".
12. I don't like men calling women "sweetie".
13. I don't like over-sporty men.
14. I don't like men who stink.
15. I don't like men who over-do the cologne.
16. I don't like men with stinky breaths.
17. I don't like men who try to inspire me to exercise.
18. I don't like men staring at my boobs.
19. I don't like sexist men.
20. I don't like politically correct men. Yes, That's "POLITICALLY CORRECT".
21. I don't like men who wear purple.
22. I don't like men who wear rhinestones.
23. I don't like men who can't cook.
24. I don't like men who are players.
25. I don't like men who don't have hair.
26. I don't like most Asian men and that includes Indian men.
27. I don't like men who don't appreciate the arts.
28. I don't like men who don't read.
29. I don't like men with excessive facial hair.
30. I don't like men who get gushy.
31. I don't like men who can't make good conversation.
32. I don't like men who can't honour commitments.
33. I don't like men who can't hold their drink.
34. I don't like bullies.
35. I don't like women who can't cook.
36. I don't like people who have hobbies to appear hip.
37. I don't like people who pretend to appreciate the arts.
38. I don't like women with no careers.
39. I don't like dirty public washrooms.
40. I don't like women who are over-curious.
41. I don't like gossip-mongers.
42. I don't like sanitary napkins.
43. I don't like Mamata Banerjee.
44. I don't like her disrupting my life. Isn't my life enough disrupted already?
45. I don't like margarine.
46. I don't like bread warmed in the microwave.
47. I don't like thick soups.
48. I don't like chapped skin.
49. I don't like bras that don't fit well.
50. I don't like my home state. I hate it, actually.
51. I don't like alumni associations, even though I'm a part of mine and I sort of miss my loony classmates.
52. I don't like people ask me why I'm single, aren't the above reasons enough already?
53. I don't like to be late and I can't stand people who make me wait.
54. I don't like most doctors, I don't believe most of them.
55. I don't like fitness instructors, I think most of them are unfit.
56. I don't like exes. Mine stink.
57. I don't like older women pointing out that I'm top heavy. I hate that term actually.
58. I don't like wearing yellow, though I love yellow flowers, they make me happy.
59. I don't like red roses. I've never, ever had red roses sent to me.
60. I absolutely dread surprises.
61. I hate my schedule going awry.
62. I hate disorganization, to me life should be a straight line.
63. I hate people who can't appreciate a sunset.
64. I hate my periods. I hate what hormones do to my brain. They make me near suicidal and I hate being so depressed.
65. I hate doing my taxes.
66. I hate paperwork and my home paperwork puts my teeth on an edge because it HAS to be perfect.
67. I don't like the summers. Which is a pity because the better part of my life is being spent where it will mostly be hot.
68. I don't like not having my way. Always. Because, I am always right.
69. I hate chocolate brown lipstick.
70. I hate the widening disparity between the rich and the poor in India and all over the world.
71. I don't like unnecessary meanness.
72. I don't like organised religion. It scares the shit out of me.
73. I don't like Godmen. Mostly because I envy the industry they have created. It used to be my ambition to be a Godwoman one day.
74. I intensely hate child molestors who blame their crappy childhood for turning out to be screwed up. I know plenty of people with truly crappy childhoods who have turned out to be wonderful people and I can't see the justification in that statement.
75. I don't like it when I call up my mother and her phone is engaged. Or my sister's. I have proprietary rights to both of them.
76. I hate sleeping alone at night and having no one to snuggle up to. That is the reason I post torturous posts so late in the night.
77. I don't like women or men who don't enjoy sex. I know plenty and so does everyone I know.
78. I don't like most people in the Calcutta clubs. I find them horribly annoying and tedious and superficial.
79. I don't like having no leisure time.
80. I don't like oily, greasy food.
81. I don't like people who don't enjoy food.
82. I don't like people who are fussy eaters.
83. I don't like the smell of fat rendering.
84. I don't like to drink spirits. I am a wine drinker.
85. I don't like my hair.
86. I don't like most Indian weddings. I find them crass and vulgar.
87. I don't like women who think they should be total bitches professionally to get to the top. Doesn't work and just makes people hate you that much more.
88. I don't like to be pushed while shopping.
89. I don't like being approached by shop people unnecessarily.
90. I don't like cats.
91. I don't like lack of ambition.
92. I don't like global warming.
93. I don't like ball point pens. I only write with ink pens.
94. I I don't like being dehydrated.
95. I hate spam.
96. I don't like tinned foods.
97. I don't like Indian soap operas.
98. I don't like Indian news channels.
99. I don't like fighting with my family, but they get on my nerves a lot.
100. I don't like people who pretend to be cool on their blogs but actually are really boring in their real life.