Sunday, December 06, 2015

Diary of a Socialite-Frootcake Prachi Madam, member of CCFC, Tolly, Bengal Club, Inner Circle, LSG and soon to be member of THE one and only Wine Club

1. Get up at the unearthly hour of 7:30 am to kiss kids goodbye, who are off to school. Ask Ayah if she has made those grilled cheese sandwiches for Karan baba and chicken nuggets for Priah. Life is so hard.
2. Go back to sleep at 7:40 am.
3. Get up at 8:30 am, drink honey-lime water, do potty-shotty, pull on lulu lemons brought in US/ Kaenneda, head to Gym. Need to consult google calendar to see if it is pilates or yoga. Sigh! Time just flies!
4. Return home at 10:30 am, call Aanchal to confirm venue of lunch. Head into the bathroom for a much-needed soak. God! My firang instructor Gavin, is SUCH a task master. Meri toh jaan hi nikal gayi. You know, they say Gavin was a US marine.
5. Drink a restorative green tea. Hamare bagan ki.
6. Finish shampooing and bath at 11:40 am. Can't decide. Should I wear the Anamika Khanna or the Pucci sheath for lunch. Hmmmm.... That annoying Priyam, fresh from her Hawaii break is coming too, so Pucci, it is. Uske saath, ye South Sea Pearls will be on fleek (I'm so clued-in) and my Choos. And of course, my Hermes gold Birkin. Let them top that!
7. Head out to Smoke House Deli at 12:30 pm. Ghar ke bagal me hi to hai. Check hair. Take duckface selfie. Update on IG and FB, as "A casual lunch with mah girlz. Girlpower!!!". Snapchat it to hubby. Get no response. Call him. He says, "For God sakes Prachi, I'm in a meeting." What an insensitive man. Must complain to Mom, and ask her to tell Mummyji. Fat lot of good that will do. Still.
8. Reach Smokehouse, head to our regular table. Wo centre wali, because being the goddesses we are, everyone MUST know we are there. Order the Watermelon-Feta-Arugula salad, sparkling water and the spinach-ricotta ravioli. Check out everyone's outfits. That showoff Priyam is in Victoria Beckham. BUT, it is last season. Snerk. I tell her, "Tu toh maar hi dalegi aaj Priyam Bhabhi. Oof kya lag rahi ho!" Moan about how the kids are taking tennis lessons also, as well as French, Violin & Piano and am pestering Poresh to teach Priah to paint. Poresh, you know, Poresh Maity, the artist. My very dear friend. Avani is late. God, she is glowing. Is she pregnant? Kis ke saath gulchchare uda rahi hai? Must find out. My salad has some black spots. Called the waiter loudly. He's saying it is crushed pepper. Am going to totally call Abhilasha and complain. I mean, standards toh rahe hi nahin.
9. I and Nidhi air-kiss everyone and leave early. We have inner-circle, you know. I'm on the invitations committee. For this quarter's play. Naseer, Ratna and Heeba are doing their third play in Calcutta. All good friends. Bade hi sweet log hain. Naseer bhai ke to kya kehne.
10. By the time I reach home at 5 pm, I am bushed and the kids are home. Say Hi to them. Give instructions to chef to rustle up pasta and an omelette for Priah and ask what Karan will do for dinner. Then, I just crash on the bed for a nap. So tired.
11. Get up at 6:30 pm. Hubby is back. We have our nespressos. My hair-wali is here. Head into my powder room. She does my makeup and hair. We have this dinner at Tolly for Jenny and Martin, the UK Consul-general, very dear friends and lovely human beings above all, who are leaving for Austria. What fun. We will catch up with them in Vienna next year. Anyhow, I'm in the Cavalli and Nirav Modi danglers. Even, hubby notices and compliments. Chalo, 16 years are not in vain. Who says marriages are not made in heaven. I forgive him for today morning.
12. Hubby wants to take the Rolls, but I think thoda zyaada hai. So we decide to take the Audi. You see, I am always right about these things. We head out at 7:50 pm. God! The Traffic. Kya fayda hua flyover banwane ka? Khair... Momota Di is such a sweetie. Kuch keh bhi nahi sakte hain. Anyhow, we reach Tolly, and head to the Antiquity hall. All our set is there. Must say hello to everybody. Have to catch up and exchange the latest, not to mention check out everyone's dos. There's no place like Calcutta, right?
Shall update tomorrow. Badi hi achchi party thi. I have to go talk with Jenny now.