Friday, March 25, 2011

Hey Sista Go Sista Soul Sista Flow Sista

Does anyone remember that song, even?

Lately I've been busy. So busy, I haven't had time to write, get a haircut, get a manicure, buy groceries, read a book or keep up with friends. I don't see any change in this situation anytime soon.

When I occasionally resurface to get a gasp of air and catch up with my friends, I get confused. All my close friends have embraced motherhood not just once but twice over now. At times, we have nothing much to say to each other but old friendship is such a thing, you just sorta go along with the flow. For me, having them ladies around makes my life somewhat more balanced, and I am glad my friends accept me even though I neglect them, sometimes for decades because I'm too busy doing my stuff.

Whenever I meet some of my close friends, I cant help feel life is unfair in general to women. Where we meant to child-bear and give up our careers for our kids and husbands/ partners? Why is it so difficult to do both? I'm not saying it is easy, I know it is very difficult for working mums, and that is my problem. Why is it not difficult for working dads? Even now, the cooking-sewing-flowers-growing is essentially a ladies' chore, at least in India. Rarely does a man equally handle child bearing and rearing. Being your child's best buddy and friendly cop is not really bearing the burden of parenthood. When I see an equal amount of men cleaning poop, I will shut up. In reality, most of the dirty parts of child bearing are done by women. Which is probably why the mother-child bond is stronger. Perhaps, mothers do love their kids more, enough to carry them to term, breast feed, handle the poop and the vomit and then do it all over again.

All the men who start calling me an asshole on reading the above, please bear in mind that my blog is about my personal experiences and not yours, which is why, shut the fuck up. As for the gay dudes, wtf is wrong with you, why want a mewling puking thing that will accuse you of ruining its life once it has the power to argue and deliberate?

I marvel everyday at my friends, sister, cousins and colleagues who have chosen to have children. But, in the corners of my heart, I feel the world is unfair and unjust.

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